The Completely Predictable Story
by MasterFrench
Summary: Read at your own risk. This story has a bad cast, horrible jokes, and a completely predictable plotline. Rated K plus for mild violence. Should be rated bc for bad content. You have been warned...
1. Forewarning

**A few things before we get started... I'm MasterFrench and I have decided to take a break from my other story to write something comical and bad. Or comically bad. Or badly comical. Either way, you get the point. This story is not to be taken seriously and is purposefully written badly and has a completely predictable plotline. It is called The Completely Predictable Story after all. Also, It is written in a play format which is much different from a traditional story. Why is it written in a play format? You'll see. But, it will look like this:**

 **MasterFrench: (While rubbing forehand) It's getting late... I should head to bed.**

 **MastetFrench puts away his tablet, turns out his light and jumps in his bed.**

 **So, it will look wierd. And, well, I have decided not to put little footnotes and headers on the chapters because it's just a bit of information that almost no one reads anyway. So why have it?**

 **Prologue: A Myster-hero**

 **Stage set: It is just after midnight in a back alleyway to an orphanage. The moon's are completely hidden by clouds which plunges the world in almost complete darkness. The only light comes from a torch held by a mean-looking SandWing who has two other SandWings close in tow. They appear to be robbing the orphanage even though orphanages have almost no money to steal. A sudden Whosh of air reveals the presence of another dragon landing nearby.**

SandWing Thug #2: Wha was dat...

SandWing Thug #1: It sounded like a Whosh.

SandWing Thug Leader: Just be aware. I don't feel safe robbing this orphanage...

Mysterious Figure: You shouldn't...

 **The torch suddenly goes out as if someone had blown it out. In the darkness, SandWing thugs # 1 and 2 have gripped each other in fear.**

SandWing Thug #2: I don't like dis boss.

SandWing Thug #1: Yeah, we can't see in the dark...

Mysterious Figure: But I can... Cracked ribs!

 **Crack!**

StanDing Thug #2: Owey.

Mysterious Figure: Fractured skull!

 **Crunch!**

SandWing Thug #1: Arrrrgggh!

Mysterious Figure: Broken Tibia...

SandWing Thug Leader: **(Whilst cowering in fear)** What's a Tibia?

 **Snap!**

SandWing Thug Leader: Ow! My freaking tibia!

 **The Mysterious Figure leaves the thugs in their pain to be eventually picked up by some guards. He makes a quick getaway into the night...**

 **End Scene**


	2. What ho! Good sir!

**Stage Set: It is the early morning of the following day and two fine gentle-dragons are sitting in an outdoor café striking a mild conversation. The clouds from the previous night have only partially faded leaving the weather in a slight overcast. The predictably quiet and peaceful town is just waking up to news of another group of thugs that had been apprehended already beaten up. No one knows who this mysterious heroine is but they thank him/her for keeping their town free of trash.**

 **Chapter I: What ho! Good Sir!**

SandWing Gentle-dragon: Good morning my fine NightWing friend! Haven't you heard? The Mysterious Heroine has struck again! This time it stopped a group of thugs from robbing an orphanage.

NightWing gentle-dragon: But of course, my fine SandWing friend! No one ever shuts up about him even when he isn't responsible for the good deed. But a name has finally arisen... They call him The Mysterious-Dragon-Who-Seems-to-be-Very-Rich-and-Pretends-to-be-a-Jerk. Or just ThatGuy.

SandWing gentle-dragon: Yes, what a fine and fitting name for the Mysterious Heroine that has taken a part in our imaginary town. Yes, ThatGuy. A fine name indeed.

 **The conversation meets an awkward silence as it has reached its end. No one really wants to start another one anyway... A NightWing who has a very suspicious black eye approaches the two dragons who are enjoying their unnamed beverages from their teacups.**

SandWing gentle-dragon: What ho! My new NightWing friend. Have you heard the news?

NightWing stranger: What? No! Of course not! I have no idea that ThatGuy has saved an orphanage. I am not very up to date with the current news.

NightWing gentle-dragon: Oh well then. May we at least have your name then?

NightWing stranger: Of course! My name is DreamGuy. Uh crap. I mean ThatStone. Dang. Um, my name is DreamStone. May I have yours?

 **The gentle-dragons look at each other in confusion and then shrug it off.**

SandWing gentle-dragon: Ah, yes. My name is StoneHead and this is BlackDragon. May I ask how you got your black eye? If there is crime in our city then it must be reported.

DreamStone: Uh, I fell down the stairs.

StoneHead: But there isn't such thing as stairs in this universe. We dragons are noble creatures and merely fly up and down levels. Would you like to tell us the truth? It is not kind to lie to a friend.

DreamStone: Oops. I mean, I accidentally... punched myself... in the eye.

BlackDragon: Oh, well why didn't you say so? That would have been much easier to say than a lie.

Stonehead: Wait, if you are not up to date then you mustn't know about the rouge IceWing animus! I guess we must tell you! Even though they don't have animus powers, there is an IceWing who plans to do terrible things to the world running around up North. If I wasn't a fine gentle-dragon then I would deal with him myself but alas! I would not be here for other shady figures such as yourself to give important plot information to. Such is life I suppose...

DreamStone: Terrible Things?! Someone must stop him!

BlackDragon: Yes. Maybe a heroine like ThatGuy could take him down.

DreamStone: Then what am I... I mean what is he waiting for?

 **DreamStone takes off in flight towards the cold north ready to take down a very cliche villain. The two gentle-dragons look upon his slowly disappearing form in confusion.**

StoneHead: Hmm. A strange fellow that one is.

BlackDragon: Yes indeed.

Waitress dragon: Your bill, sirs. Five Whatever-we-use-as-money.

StoneHead: Eh. Put it upon our tabs. I have places to be...

 **End Scene**


	3. A Dessert?

**Stage set: It is just around noon as Dreamstone is flying towards either his impending doom or glorious future. He traveled from his imaginary town into the desert. (Not the dessert. That is much more tastier.) Not much to describe in the desert. Just lots of sand and stereotypical yet very-not-true treasure burial sites. Yes, just your typical desert. Nothing special...**

A Dessert?

Dreamstone: (after some endless rambling) -or it could be spelled d-e-s-d-i-r-t even though it has clearly already been correctly written three times. But all people have to do is turn on autocorrect and-

?: Hey, You! Wait up!

 **A SandWing propelled itself from the sand as it followed Dreamstone through the air. It just goes to wonder how SandWings can magically breathe sand and just how long the SandWing had been waiting there and what it had been doing in the desert all by itself.**

Dreamstone: That's now four times... And that is just plain creepy. Why do you guys do that anyway?

?: Are you talking to me? Are you talking to me? Well, you must be talking to me because I'm the only one here.

Dreamstone: Is this charades or twenty questions? 'Cause honestly I don't have time for either.

?: That promise I made to her... You know what would have happened if she hadn't said anything? Buddy, you'd be dead where you stand.

 **The conversation seemed to have taken a dark turn but another older SandWing burst from a nearby patch of sand. Wait... nearby patch of sand?**

New SandWing: There you are! We have been looking all over for you you! I'm sorry, this is Reference and I'm her sister, Unimportant. I'm sorry if she has harassed you, she was dropped on her head when she was young.

Reference: This conversation feels very one-sided!

Unimportant: You are in enough trouble as it is so I would shut up if I were you.

Reference: You can silence my voice but you will never silence my spirit!

Dreamstone: So this is normal?

Unimportant: No, she is completely bonkers.

Reference: (somehow magically says in a Scottish accent) I'm right here, ya know?

 **A SandWing head pops out from the endless patch of sand that is spread out before them.**

Disembodied SandWing head: Yeah! So are we. So can you keep it down, we're trying to take naps here!

Dreamstone: Holy whatever-we-worship! How many of you are down there?

 **The disembodied head slowly sinks back into the sand.**

Disembodied head: You may never knoooooowwwwwww...

Dreamstone: Um?

Reference: (magically also knows a Swedish accent) Now don't go makin' a chicken out of a feather.

Dreamstone: Actually, you bring up a great point. How does something as small as a chicken or a lizard sustain dragons larger than elephants, if they are in this universe at all.

Unimportant: I've learned to just roll with it.

 **Dreamstone's stomach begins to rumble as a look of embarrassment comes upon her face.**

Reference: GODZILLA!

 **End scene**

 **P.S. I don't think that I said this, but I don't own WoF and, while we're at it, any of the things I have referenced in this chapter or any future chapters. Or do I...**


	4. The Most Serious Never Mind

**Stage Set: We find ourselves in the frozen wastelands of the north as an actually kimd-looking IceWing descends to a rather small looking and crapily built igloo. There is nothing but a writing desk and a bed(?). The dragon sits down in front of the writing desk. Not on a chair, because that would be silly since dragons have tails.**

 **The Most Serious... Never Mind**

"NiceWing": Another day... gone. Everyone still hates and ignores me... And I still didn't have enough courage to ask her out. Maybe tomorrow or maybe never...

 **The "NiceWing" stares of into space. When she snaps back to reality, her gaze is full of anger and the hunger for revenge.**

"MeanWing": I'll just have to make them pay. Make them all pay. When I learned of my powers... I swore that I would use them for good... this is for societies good. And poisoning the water supply is a bit too cliché anyway. Didn't, like, a bunch of people do it? Like the Puffin, or the Scarebird, or the Jacker?

 **She takes out a scroll from thin air and begins to writing upon it.**

MeanWing: (writing) I enchant every dragon in Phyria to very rarely burst out in song and get more frequent every single day. This spell cannot be broken by any other animus except me at my own free will.

MeanWing:(speaking): Yes... that's perfect. In fact, I can feel it working now... I FEEL A SONG COMING ON!

 _I'm Not Evil_

Preformed and Sang by: MeanWing

Genera: Evil Villain Themes

Oh, these pretty stars and the things that are are just so beautiful...

But that is how they look.

I'm just some character with no backstory or an explanation...

For my, sad outlook.

All I want you know... is that...

(Drastic boost in tempo and dynamics)

Oh I'm not evil just because the way I spoke.

Oh I'm not evil, my spirit has just been broke.

All I wish for is just a little love.

All I am returned is great big shove.

 **MeanWing is now shouting her theme song at the ceiling of her igloo. She proceeds to... you know what, screw it. No one wants to listen to this song anyway so let's fast forward a bit. It is now a minute and 33 seconds later. SadWings is curled up in a ball crying... like she often does... So sad.**

SadWings: But mother was always the nice one. Like she used to say: "Go away, no one likes you.". **(Her tears begin to dry up as she lifts her head.)** What was I doing again?

End scene


End file.
